dry road

I've been in a tight struggle with myself for quite awhile. My spiritual part of me is starving, and I've no one to blame but myself. I crave it, miss it....I am depreived of the freedom God has allowed me. My laziness has overcome it, and I am back at the bottom of the ladder, that goes up to my path. Right now it doesn't feel like a journey, it feels like a stopping point, and to go on, I'm not sure what to do. I feel almost empty and have needed to just know that I can do it, and I am worthwhile to do it. I pick up the Bible, and am quick to set it down. I can't seem to find a peace in it all. I'm searching backwards with my eyes closed, and wish I could change my view. I will breathe once again, and hopefully change this dry road I find myself on.